Have you ever thought… “I’ve just got to get to the root of this problem.”

Actually, you don’t.

It does feel like if you could just get to the bottom of things, you could sort it all out, but if that worked, most everything would have been solved ages ago. Digging around in the dirt, hanging out in the muck is actually counter-productive. What you focus on expands. Where attention goes, energy flows. And we would all agree we don’t need anymore of “the problem.”

So what to do? Give up? Throw our hands up in the air? Also counter-productive.

Let’s look to nature for a possible solution…

When a plant isn’t thriving, we don’t dig it up to look at the roots in order to figure out what’s wrong. That is a sure way to the plant becoming more stressed. Instead, we give the plant what it needs to thrive – more sunshine or more shade, more water or more nutrients.

If a close friend was going through a tough spot, you don’t go digging around trying to find the root of the problem. You show them kindness, consideration, love – in other words, you nurture them and give them what they need to be strong and solid.

Give this same gift to yourself. Focus on nurturing yourself. More kindness, more understanding, more gentleness – this is what allows you to flourish and grow through the challenge. Once your feet are solid under you again, that is the time you can make a decision for “next time”, however when you are In the middle of the muck you actually don’t have the capacity to figure it out. You are in fight, flight, fright survival mode. Nurturing yourself creates the conditions for you to heal, strengthen and grow.

I forgive myself for believing I need to get to the root of the problem.

I give myself permission to nurture myself and shift my energy to creating what supports me.

I can dig up the old stuff, or I can nurture myself and grow – I choose to nurture myself and grow.

I am free to nurture myself with more kindness today.

I remember being kind to myself in a nurturing way when I (give yourself a specific example of when this worked to pull you out of the muck)

This situation is an opportunity for me to be more nurturing to myself.

I am grateful for my own nurturing – it makes a difference!

Imagine all the energy you have spent in the past “trying to get to the root of it”. What might you be able to create by shifting all of that energy to nurturing yourself?

Try it on, and let me know!




Suze's Musings

Insights for your Inner Coach


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